


Faded

by awaywiththefairies



Category: DBSK, DBSK|Tohoshinki|TVXQ, JYJ - Fandom
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-09
Updated: 2013-11-09
Packaged: 2018-01-01 00:22:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1038128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/awaywiththefairies/pseuds/awaywiththefairies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Time was becoming a blur, but Junsu was always there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Faded

 

He lay on the bed, watching smoke curl around him with every slow exhale. His hand felt heavy as he brought the cigarette up to his mouth for another drag. The sheets would smell. Junsu hated it when the sheets smelled. He sighed and put it out in the ashtray next to the bed instead.

The ceiling was blank, or as blank as anything could be. Cracks and creaks in the corners still showed its age. His room didn’t have a window, but somehow everything became interesting after looking at it long enough. Like Junsu. Junsu was perfect, really. But he hadn’t noticed right away. It was only the imperfections that he saw at first, and he had collected them. He had logged more and more of Junsu’s faults into his memory, until he recognised the beauty of it all. It had taken him a while.

As if drawn in by his thoughts, Junsu slipped through the door with a tray of breakfast, in a valiant attempt to surprise him. Jaejoong acted as if he was, but he had heard the clatter down the hall. It didn’t matter anyway. Neither did it matter that the bread was stale and the coffee didn’t taste much like anything at all. It was the gesture that was important. And Junsu, who was still half-naked. Jaejoong let his eyes roam over the bare arms and legs, while Junsu tried to slip under the sheets again as fast as possible. Cold or self-conscious, Jaejoong couldn’t decide.

Junsu had lost a lot of weight lately. It made him look very different. Jaejoong had noticed of course, but only worried about the change now that the mattress didn’t dip the way it used to. He quickly wrapped his arms around him, as if to ascertain that the other was still there, and healthy. Junsu whispered reassuring nothings into his ear.

He got told off for smoking, of course Junsu would notice, but he didn’t mind. He would quit if Junsu asked it of him, but he never did. Maybe he understood that Jaejoong could not live without. Junsu didn’t smell like smoke; he smelled fresh, clean, as always, and Jaejoong was glad for it, glad that he hadn’t tainted him. He even made sure to smoke away from the couple of clothes that Junsu had lying around in his room.

His phone buzzed loudly against the bedside table, stilling them both. Jaejoong hesitated, unable to clear his mind. It took long seconds for his eyes to focus on the display. It read Yoochun. He suddenly realised he had reached for his phone and then halted midway. Junsu was watching him, head tilted cutely to the side. Jaejoong cupped his face and turned towards him, pressing their lips together. His hand could be doing better things than hanging in the air.

It was darker now; someone must have closed the door. They were just lying close, looking at each other. Junsu was humming a song, Jaejoong tracing the outline of his body, when the phone rang again. He frowned and turned towards the noise. He’d turn it off this time. He grabbed his phone, and stared at Yoochun’s picture. He was smiling in it. The photo was from one of their birthday parties, way back. The buzzing stopped and started up again. He took the call.

“Hey,” Yoochun said. “Thanks for picking up. I was getting worried.”

Jaejoong mumbled something in reply, suddenly craving a cigarette. He carded his fingers through Junsu’s hair instead. The call had ended his humming.

“Jae,” Yoochun said. His voice sounded weird, off.

“Yeah,” Jaejoong croaked out. He coughed a little, trying to get his voice to work properly. “I’m here.”

It was silent for a moment. Jaejoong tried to imagine what Yoochun’s face must look like on the other side of the conversation. Maybe he was frowning? Junsu watched with a smile as he tried on various expressions.

“Jae, me and Junsu are going-”

Jaejoong couldn’t hear the rest of the sentence clearly. “What?”

Junsu snuggled up to him, trying to listen in on the conversation. Jaejoong nuzzled his neck, deciding it had really been too long since he’d kissed that particular spot on him.

A sigh. “I know you don’t like being third wheel, but other people are coming too,” Yoochun continued.

Jaejoong hummed something noncommittal. It was silent on the other end.

“I didn’t think you’d ruin our friendship over this.”

Yoochun sounded annoyed and sad and angry and Jaejoong frowned.

“Over what?”

His lips ghosted over Junsu’s ear making him shake with laughter, but he didn’t make a sound. Jaejoong knew his weaknesses, however, and slipped a hand under his shirt, fingers teasing.

“You know very well what I mean: me dating Junsu.”

Jaejoong pulled his hand back, confused. “Junsu?” he whispered.

“Jaejoong?” Yoochun’s voice sounded distant.

Junsu looked back at him, face blank.

“Jae, please don’t hang up again.”

“Jae?” Yoochun repeated.

“Jae, you asshole, answer me!”

\--

Junsu was stroking his hair soothingly, the phone call forgotten, although the memories of the past days, weeks, months, were less easy to get rid of. The three of them laughing, Yoochun lying in the grass, Junsu smiling widely at him, Junsu cracking one of his lame jokes, Junsu almost walking into a lamp post, Yoochun kissing Junsu, Junsu kissing him back.

He turned onto his stomach and hid his face in a pillow, letting the dark replace those images as it had before. Small hands massaged his shoulders, his neck, and he slowly relaxed again while listening to the soft hum of one of Junsu’s favourite songs.

It didn’t matter who Yoochun was dating, he thought. He still had his Junsu. His Junsu was better anyway; His Junsu had picked him. He heard Junsu laugh softly and turned around, curious. Lips met his.

 


End file.
